over this hill in time

i picked up my cap and gown for graduation yesterday. Yes im graduating from Suffolk... and though im glad this part of my life is over not to mention that it only took me 2 years at suffolk which norm people have to stay there for 3 years. But when i payied for the black robs all the women behind the counter were like CONGRADUATION! GOOD FOR YOU!!!! somehow in my head i really do not think graduating from Suffolk is that much of a big deal.. in fact it was my mom that wanted me to walk at graduation.. urg something i really do not want to be but seeing as they payed for most of my education who am i to argue.

OH and me and Kevin are still together!! YAY and i get to see him soon even better!!!
Evan is still a toolbag
working every day this week doubles SUX
and food running on saturday URGGGGG
BUTTTTTTTT
Life is good!! <3
LOVE!!!!! SAVE THE EMPTY
GOOD NIGHT!

i missed everything up.

i missed everything up.
i missed everything up.
i missed everything up.
i FUCKING missed everything up.


why do i do this to myself all the fucking time.
i feel the words coming out of my mouth and know i should stop myself but nope.. i just let the vomit come out.

i told Kevin that i had said something to Evan about him having problems in certain areas (which telling Evan all of this i told him before me and Kevin started actaully dating). But it was only to ask if i could do anything to help in those areas but i think he took it wrong. which sucks because now Kevin doesn't have any problem.. in fact its the best sex i have ever had. He is the first guy that can actually get me off while having sex. he's the first guy i can actually see myself with for a while....and i hurt him.. i manged to make him now not trust me.
i have to stop because i just cant write anymore without starting a cry.

FUCKKKKKK! why do i fuck everything up.